Back To The 310 (or will it be 323?)

It's official. Rambler is taking the show to the coast. I have about a month to pack up my life and start again. I'm not doing it for money and I'm not doing it for love.

So why am I doing it?

I came back to New York almost ten years ago for a dream job. There was a girl here too, but within a year of me being back here we'd broken up. We won't get into the fact that the dream job turned out to be anything but. A lot of that was my fault, a lot of it was circumstance. Whatever. We will not regret the past.

In that time, I never changed my driver's license. I went down to the DMV a few times but got annoyed. I never had all the right forms. They wanted a social security number. The line was too long. I always found a reason not to do it.

The truth is, I didn't want to get a NY license. I didn't want to shut the door on Los Angeles and although it was only symbolic, to me getting that New York license was doing just that. Keeping the California one was like an escape hatch in my wallet.

Whenever I land at LAX, I feel like I'm home. Whenever I land at Kennedy or La Guardia I don't feel anything. I smile when I drive past that Randy's Donut Shop. Conversely, I grimace driving past that awful looking Trump Nursing home. I love looking at the hills and the lights when I go up La Cienega. You get the idea.

I will have to start over. I have friends there but many are now married, kids, etc. Obviously I won't be spending my Fridays and Saturdays at the Formosa and Three of Clubs and Burgundy Room anymore. Those days are over and even if they weren't, I'm too fucking old for that shit.

The fellowship in LA is not New York. It will be a challenge. On the other hand, it is also a more laid back town so maybe the craziness that can hit me here won't hit as hard there or can be resolved by a nice drive.

There are a few who think I'm being motivated by a skirt. I had been thinking about this long before that and we all know how I felt about my current job. It was a life boat when I needed it but it's time to give the game one more shot and see if I have anything left. If I don't I move on.

Back to the girl. I won't sit here and say that I don't have thoughts in the back of my mind. That would be a lie. But that is not my motivation unless it is buried so deep that I can't see it. I'm a pretty smart guy. I think I'd see that.

I think I see a lot now. Anyway, I'll have new things to bitch about out there. No Duane Reade out there but they do have CVS. And those annoying pedestrians...