My mom is getting old. Not older, old.
I worry about her. She's alone.
We take care of her financially but asking and accepting help is very hard for her.
Now you know where I get it from.
Somehow she filled us with the idea that being vulnerable is bad. It wasn't conscious on her part but nonetheless that was the message that got through. It's why I tend to chase away the people who are nicest to me.
But I'm not talking about me. My mom has a lot of negative energy. It's tough to talk to her. So much bitterness sometimes. I used to think my dad was the bitter angry one but now I see it was her. He stopped being angry when their marriage ended. Go figure.
I love my mom. But I also know I don't want to make the same mistakes and have the same anger.
Guess I better be careful then because that is the path I'm on.
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