I Got Nothing

For you
Got nothing for me
Got nothing for that guy down the street
Got nothing for the lady with no pants
Got nothing for the man with no job
I got nothing

So there's this woman who peddles AM New York, our free daily, in front of the 96th Street station. Clearly she is impaired. It is the most depressing thing to walk by her every day and here say over and over again, "AM New York, read all about it, have a nice day" in the voice of a twelve year-old who got hit with a frying pan. I pass her on my descent into the hell that is that station and think there has to be somewhere else.

Yes, I'm a little burnt on New York. I'm coming up on ten years here and really starting to want out. I'm also forgetting that I'm not supposed to regret the past. I'm full of regrets. Should is a word that needs to leave my vocabularly but I'm stuck in should've done this, should've done that.

It's a sure fire way back to self-loathing. I know I need to stop and need to get over this shit and stop trying to find some quick fix like a new job or something. The answer is in me, not on the outside.

But for now, I got nothing.

AM New York, have a nice day.